You’re standing in a clothing store trying on clothes and you cannot decide if you should buy the dress that you have tried on 3 times. You have looked in the mirror for about 20 minutes and you are still unsure if you should purchase it or not. You can see that the retail assistant is loosing patience with you, but for the life of you, you cannot make a decision. You end up buying the dress only to regret the decision when you get home and immediately think of how you are going to get your money back on the item.
How about this scenario, you are organising a night out with friends and you cannot decide where to eat. You go through the list of restaurants in your mind and just when you think you have made a decision, you freak out and think that you should probably eat in the next suburb over. You start thinking about the list of restaurants in the next suburb and then decide at the last-minute to eat at the place you originally decided on.
Making decisions…..pretty tough, annoying, frustrating, unclear, dis-empowering and scary as all hell! Not to mention the agony we put our friends and family in when trying to make a decision as simple as should I order the Pad Thai or the Panang Curry?!
So why is it soooo harddddd to make decisions? I have discovered the answer to this question, but you’re not going to like it! Making decisions comes from trusting yourself and having confidence in yourself. When you trust yourself, you are better able to make decisions and the most important delicious piece of information is this. When you trust yourself, you begin to trust others. For example, trusting that a restaurant with rave reviews is a great decision for a place to eat, or trusting that the sales assistant will return your dress in the next 14 days if you need to refund it, or trusting in the chef to make the Pad Thai you ordered delicious.
The inability to make decisions comes from fear based thinking that everything will turn to crap and it will not turn out the way you planned!
So, what is the solution? Well, being a woman who had a severe phobia to making decisions I started a little game with myself. When I needed to make a decision, I looked to the feelings behind the decision-making process, if I was unsure, it generally meant that I did not want the object, or drive into the city to meet friends, or hang out with a friend when I wanted to be relaxing instead.
The next HUGE thing I did when I made a decision, I stuck to it. I did not give myself permission to change my mind. I dealt with the consequences if it wasn’t a great decision, however, the consequences were never that heart breaking anyway, so it didn’t matter. My aim was to become a great decision maker and to trust in my own ability to make decisions and trust myself. This eliminates the whirlwind of emotions that come with decision-making. Let me tell you, I felt so empowered and confident when I started making decisions this way.
When someone has a fear of making decisions it feels like it will be the end of the world if we make the wrong decision, so repeat to yourself “It is safe for me to make decisions!”. This affirmation will empower you!!
Make a decision today and let me know!
Bloom For Love!
The Bloom For Love Program begins Monday 3rd November. There will be Free Live Webinars over this month.
There have been many wonderful reviews about the program from the first round of participants. Here is a testimonial from one of my Bloom Babes, Toni:
I just wanted to thank you for such an amazing program! Going through the modules I have learned to recognize the patterns I had in the past when choosing relationships.
I have learned that I had a lot of self sabotaging behaviors & patterns. I know now a lot of my past relationship failures were due to my lack of self-care and self-love.
By following your program I have began learning to love and accept myself. I have come so far thanks to you! By following the program I was able to see things in a whole new way.
Your encouragement throughout the process kept me going through some of the hard emotional work. You are a compassionate, loving teacher and a wonderful inspiration.
If you missed out on the last round, I highly recommend you enrolling this year. The program has changed EVERY SINGLE persons life that enrolled and it can change you life too!
Love Leisa x